Embracing the Art of Allowing
I’ll never forget the day I had lunch with my university friend, Sarah. She had been traveling since graduation and was full of exotic tales about life in other countries – different languages, foods, and cultures. What she was experiencing sounded amazing. She told me she had no plans to settle down and was, in fact, preparing to pack her bags again soon to travel to the UK. Several of our mutual friends were already there, and Sarah extended the invitation to me to travel with her.
The idea sounded fantastic, and I wanted to jump at the opportunity. I’d always been interested in travel, and this seemed like the perfect chance to have the adventure of a lifetime. The trouble was, I had recently embarked on my career. I was working for a reputable company on a specific project – work I had dreamed of pursuing while obtaining my degree. It wasn’t an ideal time to pack up and leave. To compound this, I also had a strong sense of wanting to do the decent thing by my boss and my colleagues, which meant seeing the project through to completion.
On the flip side, I was worried that if I didn’t go traveling with Sarah, I would miss my chance entirely. For weeks, I was conflicted, paralyzed by confusion and completely frustrated with myself because I was totally incapable of making a decision. I was caught in one of those classic scenarios where you have your heart whispering in your left ear and your brain nagging in your right ear, both with opposing views. While leaving with Sarah sounded very tempting, I could not summon the courage to quit my job. My inner-conflict was all-encompassing.
Surrendering to the Flow
In the end, tired of waiting for me to make up my mind, Sarah left without me. Over the following weeks, at every opportunity, I dawdled around bookshops, flipping through travel guides. I finished the work project, and as the assignment came to an end, I discovered that I had enjoyed it immensely, even though at times, I had been very distracted. I also discovered that I had a real talent for the work I was doing. As a result of my dedication and commitment, the firm rewarded me with another opportunity – a promotion and a pay rise.
Ultimately, the extra money in my pay packet meant that I could afford to go and visit my friends, and this is eventually what I did. Down the track, I ended up enjoying the best of both opportunities, although at the time, I did not know that it was going to work out that way. What I know now, looking back, is that by actively not making a decision about traveling versus my career, I was practicing the art of allowing. I sat with the confusion I felt. Even though it felt like I was really stuck, I was, in fact, surrendering to the natural ebb and flow of my life and letting the next thing come to me.
Finding Comfort in Uncertainty
These days, I try to practice the art of allowing more consciously, especially at times when I feel deeply conflicted and my head and heart are giving me different messages. When you’re in a state of confusion, resistance can easily set in. This causes anger, fear, panic, tension, and stress. Then, as a consequence of these emotions, we can also feel tempted to force a decision. But it is at exactly these times – when we are most uneasy – that we need to practice the art of allowing.
Sometimes, it takes real effort to do nothing and simply be in the experience. Especially because most of us want control, and we feel the need to be in charge of every aspect of our lives, especially at junctures when we perceive that our present circumstances are under the threat of change. But by practicing the art of allowing, we accept that change is constant. We also accept that control is an illusion. And when we slow down, relax, and simply observe what is happening in our lives, we can also sense how these things make us feel. We also need to have faith that our instincts, our inner-built compass, will tell us when the time is right to reach out for an opportunity.
When we do this, we’re truly living in the present, and we open up the scope for lasting and transformational change, secure in the knowledge that our journey is as individual as we are and that whatever comes next is meant to be.
Embracing Uncertainty and Finding Flow
As I look back on that pivotal moment in my life, I realize that by not making a decision, I was actually practicing the art of allowing. I was surrendering to the natural flow of my life and trusting that the next right thing would reveal itself in due time. And that’s precisely what happened. By staying open and flexible, I was able to enjoy the best of both worlds – the security of my career and the opportunity to travel and connect with friends.
This experience taught me the power of going with the flow and letting go of the need to control every aspect of my life. As the saying goes, “The best-laid plans of mice and men often go awry.” And that’s okay. In fact, it’s a beautiful thing when we can embrace the uncertainty and trust that the universe has a plan for us, even if we can’t see it in the moment.
One of the keys to going with the flow is to cultivate a mindset of acceptance and awareness. Instead of resisting or fighting against the changes and challenges that come our way, we can learn to meet them with a sense of openness and curiosity. This doesn’t mean we don’t have goals or aspirations – it simply means we’re willing to adjust our course as needed, without getting attached to a specific outcome.
Practicing Mindfulness and Self-Compassion
Another important aspect of going with the flow is the practice of mindfulness. When we’re present and attuned to the moment, we’re less likely to get caught up in worries about the past or anxieties about the future. We can simply be with what is, allowing ourselves to flow with the natural rhythms of life.
Interestingly, research has shown that practices like mindfulness meditation can help us cultivate the psychological flexibility needed to go with the flow. By learning to observe our thoughts and emotions with a sense of non-judgment and compassion, we can become more adept at letting go of the need to control every aspect of our lives.
Of course, this is easier said than done. As human beings, we’re naturally inclined towards perfectionism and the desire for control. But by practicing self-compassion and being gentle with ourselves when we inevitably stumble, we can slowly but surely become more comfortable with the ebb and flow of life.
Embracing the Unexpected
One of the most rewarding aspects of going with the flow is the opportunity to embrace the unexpected. When we’re not rigidly attached to a specific plan or outcome, we’re more open to serendipitous moments and unexpected blessings. Perhaps we stumble upon a hidden gem of a restaurant or have a chance encounter that leads to a meaningful connection.
By being present and attuned to the world around us, we can more easily recognize and appreciate these little moments of magic. And who knows – they might just lead us down a path we never could have imagined, just like my decision to stay the course with my career ultimately allowed me to travel and explore in ways I hadn’t anticipated.
Letting Go and Trusting the Process
At the end of the day, going with the flow is about letting go of the need to control and trusting the process of life. It’s about embracing the uncertainty and the unknown, and being willing to adapt and adjust as needed. It’s about finding comfort in the ebb and flow, and knowing that even when things don’t go as planned, there’s always an opportunity for growth and discovery.
As I reflect on my own journey, I’m reminded of the wise words of Ariel Kane: “Accepting, allowing, and interacting with your life as though it is exactly as it should be, without making yourself wrong or right for what you discover, is the way to Self-Realization.”
So, the next time you find yourself feeling stuck or paralyzed by indecision, I encourage you to take a deep breath, let go, and trust that the universe has a plan for you. Who knows – it might just lead you to the most amazing adventure of your life.
If you’re looking for a hotel stay in Seoul, South Korea, I highly recommend embracing the art of allowing and going with the flow. After all, the best experiences often come when we’re open to the unexpected.
